“We met in a coffee shop, when I spilled my vanilla latte!”
How great would it be to have that as your “how we met story” with your future partner?
A random, real life interaction that led you to each other. Your own mini Serendipity moment. Fun, whimsical, and so meant-to-be.
But who meets in coffee shops anymore?
What does that even look like?
It’s actually a lot easier (and way more fun) than you might think.
Here’s the story of how it happened to me – including the two key steps I used that you can apply in your own life so it can happen to you!
One chilly Friday morning in December, I walked into a downtown Starbucks to meet an ex-boyfriend for friendly catch-up over coffee. It was something we planned every now and then just to stay in touch since amicably breaking up a few years ago.
I’d arrived a little early, so I made my way to the counter and ordered my usual vanilla latte, then picked a small table for us in between the front door and the condiments station.
Sliding into my seat, warm drink in hand, I accidentally spilled a few drops on the table. Crap.
Standing up, I turned to the station to grab a napkin, and noticed a cute guy in a red sweater standing there, adding some sugar to his coffee.
After stepping back to my table and wiping up the spill, I heard something behind me.
“You missed a spot.”
Cute guy from the condiments station was commenting on my cleaning abilities.
I looked down at the pristine tabletop for a split second before I realized his comment wasn’t about the spillage. He was flirting with me, and that was just his icebreaker.
“Oh I did huh? Is that an offer to help?” I said with a friendly smile as I turned to face him.
He laughed, and a flirtatious conversation ensued.
After exchanging names (his was Ken) and talking about what drinks we’d ordered, my ex walked in the front door and sauntered up to us.
I gave him a hug and promptly introduced him to Ken as “my friend Mike” to make it 100% clear that I wasn’t meeting Mike for a date.
While Mike went to order his own drink, Ken and I continued talking.
He carried most of the conversation, and I jumped in a few times with flirty questions, like “So, are you as addicted to caffeine as I am?” and “Do you always critique the cleaning methods of random girls?”.
I could tell by his response and the glimmer in his eye that he understood my sense of humor – a key factor in any potential suitor.
When Mike came back to us with his drink, it was time to devote my attention to him and our scheduled catch-up session.
I turned to Ken and said “Well it was nice chatting, maybe we’ll catch each other here again” with a big smile that lingered just slightly longer than normal.
He replied “I’d like that – or maybe we could just plan on it. Do you have a card?”, as he took out his own business card and wrote his phone number on the back.
I pulled out one of my cards and did the same, evening the playing field and giving him everything he needed to follow-up with me.
About an hour later, after Mike and I had caught up and parted ways, Ken sent a text asking me to lunch for the weekend. I immediately responded with “I’d love to”.
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So, how can you apply the same techniques to turn a random comment into a date for the weekend?
Let’s break down the process from the story into two key steps.
Step #1: If a guy wants to approach you, he’s probably going to say something random in attempts to engage with you, so be open to anything and everything that may come out of his mouth and realize it isn’t actually about that specific thing.
I mean, think about it from his perspective. A guy spots a girl he’s attracted to and wants to do something about it. Maybe she’s sitting on the bus next to him, or waiting in line behind him, or just spilled her vanilla latte all over the table.
He only has a few seconds to come up with something to grab her attention in a non-creepy and somewhat interesting way.
So, he’ll likely use whatever is in plain sight to start the conversation: complimenting her necklace, commenting on the weather, assessing her work with cleaning up said spilled vanilla latte.
Step #2: After he’s made that first move and put himself out there (which includes the risk of being publicly rejected by you), it’s your turn to pick up the conversation ball. So whatever random topic he happened to say to you, just go with it.
For example, when Ken made that first comment to me, I could have reacted several different ways.
If I was feeling shy, I could have pretended not to hear him and just hoped he’d go away.
If I’d taken him literally, I probably would have turned my focus to the tabletop looking for the “spot” I missed, completely forgetting about him.
Both of which would not have resulted in Ken asking me out.
But luckily after the realization that his comment wasn’t actually about the coffee, I applied the two key tips to keep the conversation going and let him know I was interested.
So the next time you get a random comment thrown your way, keep in mind it probably isn’t even about the topic at hand, always assume the best, and then just go with it!
It could lead to a weekend date with that cute stranger from coffee shop, and so much more.
In the end, I left the scene smiling for two reasons: I’d turned a spilled drink into a date for the weekend, and I was asked out in front of an ex-boyfriend. Although the latter was really just the icing on the cake – or perhaps, the extra foam on the vanilla latte.
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